Hey, what's up? I have been doing quite a lot of writing lately, ironically during my busiest time at work, so I apologize for my inability to join in the wonderful discussions that have been taking place in my diaries. Thank-you to everyone for expanding on my thoughts and giving some feedback, it is much appreciated! Now that that disclaimer is out of the way, let's move to the body of this post...

I like to think I am nice guy. Empathetic, caring, loving, a peacenik, a standard leftist progressive who perhaps cares too much. I like to laugh, have stimulating discussions, and use my logic to come to conclusions. Knowledge is life. I know this is starting to look like an EHarmony profile, but keep following me, there is a point.

I find that since I have joined this site, I have been catching myself saying things like "this place reminds me of the early Daily Kos..." in which I would go on to describe community, action and respect. All high-handed compliments to the people posting and running this place. Seriously, kudos! In turn, I have discovered that I have changed, no, I should say reverted back to what I used to be like in olden days, that is, a chilled caring person. I think it is reflected in my writings, though I've been known to still go on a rant or two...

The "dual personality" I seem to exhibit, and the fact that I am a Gemini, must be coincidental... So without further ado, I present to you Dr. Jeckyll, my reasonable, compassionate side, who rarely gets upset and takes everything with a grain salt. I thought I lost that guy for awhile, but he has always been there. He is in full-bloom on this site, and I have missed him dearly. That's American politics for you... you start as Dr. Jeckyll, full of good intention and thoughts, then, as you get into the weeds and begin to realize the reality of said political system... I start getting upset, perhaps unreasonable, and anger flows through my veins...

Then my Mr. Hyde comes out to play...

I am currently on a one-year timeout over at the Orange Irrelevant Bubble, where you might have seen me comment in the past. In those comments you may have noticed I can be quite... forward, foul, aggressive, and a bit of a hard-ass at batting down all the neoliberal nonsense... to me, neoliberal bullshit is the number one way of getting my Mr. Hyde out. Daily Kos had truly brought out the worst in me, and it has been that way for a good 5 years now after I decided Obama was full of it, and we had all been hoodwinked. Serving us Hillary Clinton only compounded the rage, as neoliberalism became entrenched in a place I once considered to be "progressive".

Watching center-right politics descend upon a place I loved so much, was difficult to say the least, but the fighter in me doesn't give two flying fucks, it was time for battle because it became apparent long ago, we were having a proxy war for the soul of the Democratic Party... and still are. In such a scenario, there is no room for Dr. Jeckyll, he does not have the tools to deal with the nastiness and lies, it is completely against his nature. Where he might struggle, is where Mr. Hyde thrives... and so for many a year I let him loose, and did battle with the corporatists (whether they know they are or not), and I took no prisoners. I got HRed and bojoeed almost daily, clicking through the "Administration Acknowledgement" became as routine as opening a Bobswern diary, and I didn't care... and I still don't. There are no regrets in a war ( at least, that's how it is supposed to be), and I was a good soldier. Still am.

The fight is and was worth it, but, I really hate Mr. Hyde... though he stands-up to bullies, he has been known to bully, when compromise was needed, he fought, when foul language was used, he put on his sailor cap and challenged the English dictionary with the best of them. He is contrarian sometimes to a fault, and when in full rage mode, has serious listening problems and logic limitations. He is exactly everything I abhor as a progressive, yet there he is... finding worth in the victory of small battles, fully participating in the larger war.

I hate him... and yet I love him. Without him, I would be letting the neoliberal naysayers off-the-hook. Without him, I would be pushing a progressive platform upriver with no paddles. Without him, I would be defenseless against all the centric attacks and talking points. Without him, God forbid, I just might except the idea of "incrementalism" and all the bullshit associated with it. Without him I would not fight, I would not resist, and I would be lost. Dam him.

So all this to say.... don't be afraid of me. Dr. Jeckyll is in this house, and Mr. Hyde is the one on timeout at the Great Orange Flame-Out... I don't miss him yet, but I do understand his worth and my need to use him at certain times... don't get me started on what happens when I meet one of those intellectually deficient conservatives full of falsities... then, then, then, then, THEN...

THIS GUY COMES OUT! (see comment)